Dissonance
by Kirsui
Summary: dissonance, noun; Lack of harmony among musical notes. Lack of agreement or harmony between people or things. - "She cannot shake the feeling of his eyes upon her, nor the terror of just how close she was to becoming like him." - [Follows the general plot of TFA and TLJ, steadily veering away from canon. Possibly Reylo later on.]
1. The Girl of the Dunes

**DISCLAIMER:  
** **I own nothing. I'm merely playing with the characters in the sandbox that is my imagination.**

 **Except for the ocht'kai. Those things are mine.**

* * *

 **dissonance** , _noun_ ;  
Lack of harmony among musical notes.  
Lack of agreement or harmony between people or things.

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 **1.**

 **The Girl of the Dunes**

* * *

For the first time in more years than she can remember, Rey awakens to a loud crash. Her eyes snap open and she is instantly on her feet, years of living in the dunes having honed her survival instincts to a fine point. Her beloved staff is in her hands as she warily makes her way through the AT-AT that she has claimed as her home, her senses on high alert.

When she gets to the head of the walker – the only room that has windows – her eyebrows rise in surprise. There, two or so hundred feet away from her walker, is a crashed space ship.

She stares at it for only a few seconds before she is on the move. She returns to her living area, hastily pulls on the clothes that will protect her from most of the heat, and gathers what little supplies she needs. It's just a scouting trip, so she won't bring much. She just needs to see the condition of the ship. She grimaces at that, at how her first instinct is to see how valuable the salvage from it might be, when she should really see if anyone survived.

It has been a long time since a ship has crashed down on Jakku, and thus it is too easy for her to forget the living.

It takes her only a couple of minutes to be ready. It's only a few hundred feet, but she does contemplate on taking her speeder anyway. It's still early morning, the sun barely having gotten over the horizon, but she knows that walking even that distance will be difficult when the sun begins to heat the sand. And, she reminds herself, if there are survivors, they would be easier to get to safety with it.

In the end, she takes the speeder.

As she approaches the craft she can see it is a TIE class fighter. A newer model than the ones she has seen in the desert before, sleek and black, all sharp edges and perfectly straight angles. But the basics of the ship have changed very little. It looks menacing, she supposes, but miraculously it seems to have survived the crash almost fully intact. She cannot even see smoke, and she realises she might have the biggest haul of her life in her hands.

That is, until she comes to a halt beside it and sees the dark figure crumpled just outside the entry hatch into the fighter.

Rey hesitates for only the briefest of moments before she unmounts her speeder and approaches the figure. He has to be the pilot, as she knows the TIE fighters are usually designed for only one person. He's lying face down in the sand, having apparently just managed to crawl out of the fighter before passing out.

She gingerly begins to turn him over to inspect how badly he is wounded, but she can see no injuries, no rips or tears or dark patches of blood in the, frankly, rather _strange_ clothing he wears.

Before he is fully on his back, a glint of sunlight catches on something on his belt. She freezes again, having expected a blaster, but instead she sees a hilt of what she assumes is a lightsaber.

Is he a _Jedi_?

Well, now she _has_ to help him, doesn't she? If the stories of Jedi are true, then it would be stupid of her to leave him to his fate.

Not that she was considering that. Not, even though it might not have been the first thought in her mind. She's too kind to leave even a complete stranger to their fate like this. Or perhaps it is because he _is_ a complete stranger. Goodness knows she could deal without some of the people from the outpost.

And then there is the question of why he's flying a TIE fighter. It's... Not really an usual choice for a Jedi, but who's to say a Jedi couldn't pilot a TIE, right?

She pushes these thoughts aside and finally turns him around. There seem to be no wounds on this side either, no rips or tears of burnt patches of clothing. This is good. It looks increasingly more certain that he will survive.

And then her gaze finds his face, and she blinks in surprise at how strangely _young_ he is. Dark lashes frame his closed eyes, just as his softly curling dark hair frames his face. He has a long nose that reminds her of ocht'kai, the desert streakers, giant birds of prey with black feathers and underbellies the colour of the sky - birds that the locals _know_ to keep an eye on and avoid, as they are known to prey on the unwary. His skin is pale, suggesting he has not seen much sunlight, and then she finally sees at least a small inclination that he was injured in the crash. There is a small scratch on his forehead that has blood seeping from it, and she wonders if he has a concussion.

She hopes not, for his sake. The scratch she can deal with, but a concussion is something she doesn't know how to handle.

Getting him to her speeder proves to be a challenge, but Rey is nothing if not determined. He's tall, so _very_ tall that she wonders if his height ever intimidates anyone. She half drags rather than carries him inside her AT-AT, into the bowels where it is cooler, where the sun's rays don't quite reach with their scorching heat. Her cot is the only bed she has, and though she knows it might be more comfortable for him, she does _not_ have the strength to lift him there. Instead she makes him as comfortable as she can on the floor, laying him on some spare blankets to ward off the chill of the AT-AT-'s hull, and propping his head on a spare pillow she snatches from her bed.

After a moment's hesitation she removes his lightsaber from his belt. No one should sleep with their weapon on them. She does place it next to him on the floor though, so that when he wakes up it is nearby. Next to that she also places a small container of water, in case he is thirsty and she's not there to find him any. She then fetches her meager medical supplies, and marvels at how deep his unconsciousness seems to be when he doesn't wake to the sting of the antiseptic. She examines the wound critically as the blood clears out, and comes to the conclusion that it is nothing serious and will heal just fine on its own.

She sighs and stands up, putting her supplies back to their places. She's mildly worried of how he hasn't awoken yet, but there's very little else she can do to help him until he does.

Rey walks out her AT-AT. She has a ship to check out for damage.

-o-o-o-

When Kylo Ren awakens, it is to a mild headache and hazy memories. He clenches his jaw shut, trying to recall how he got injured, and the memories flood back to him. He had been discussing their next move with General Hux and Captain Phasma when they received word of an incident in one of the main hangars, involving a possible traitor and an escaped prisoner.

Poe Dameron was their _only_ prisoner.

Hux had ordered Phasma to rally her troops and prevent the escape, but Ren knew it would be too late. And thus he had done the only thing he could think of and gave orders to prepare his fighter. He'd been after Dameron and the traitor almost as soon as they had gotten out of the Star Destroyer, and watched with mild annoyance as they decimated the TIE fighters sent after them.

It hadn't been a surprise to him that he had managed to clip the fighter they had stolen, sending it spiralling down towards Jakku. What _had_ surprised him, however, was the hit that _he_ had suffered almost as soon as they started their spiralling downfall. The Force had warned him of the impact too late – something that simply _never happened_ to him. As a result, he had lost all control of his TIE Silencer, and realised that if he did nothing he would most likely end up _dead_.

Thankfully, calling the Force to aid him was not a difficult task. It took him a considerable amount of energy to keep the fighter stable enough to bring it through atmosphere, but he _had_ done it. He had crashed down into the sand dunes, amongst the giant hulls of Star Destroyers long forgotten. Remnants of an old battle. A _graveyard_.

But, he had crashed down _alive_.

The last he remembered was the constricting feeling of his mask, the trail of blood that bled into his right eye, irritating his vision, how he had hazily pulled the mask off and used his last strength to get himself out of the fighter. He'd blacked out shortly after, no doubt exhausted by the excessive amount of Force he had used to keep the fighter stable, as well as from whatever injuries he might have suffered.

So why, then, does he not feel the heat of the desert now that he is awake?

Ren blinks his eyes open, and frowns at the dimly lit room he was in. It is... It looks like the insides of a an Imperial walker, if he is brutally honest, but even in the ceiling above him he sees signs of someone having made their home here. He feels uneasy in this unknown environment and reaches for his belt at the same time as he reaches out with the Force, and freezes when he feels his belt missing his lightsaber, and the life energy of a living being in the same room with him.

"It's to your right", a voice tells him, clipped, slightly hesitant. "There's water too, if you want it."

Ren glances to his right, and indeed he spots his lightsaber and a small water container. He narrows his eyes suspiciously and snatches his weapon, hastily pulling himself up to a seated position to assess the possible threat.

What he sees gives him pause.

It is a young girl, perhaps a few years younger than he is, dressed in beige and brown, her hair pulled up to three buns at the back of her head. She's seated cross-legged at a small cot, bent over some sort of a mechanical part she has on her lap with a focused look on her face. She's working on it, peering into the mess of exposed wires as she looks for what she is trying to find. A look of pure victory flashes on her face as she finds what she is looking for, disconnects a few wires and pulls out the faulty piece, swiftly tossing it aside and replacing it with a new one.

Who _is_ this girl? And where _is_ he?

The girl is speaking no more, intently putting the mechanical part she works on back together. Instead, Ren focuses on his surroundings, and comes to the conclusion that he is, indeed, inside an old Imperial AT-AT walker. There's no mistaking the structure of its walls, even though the paint has long since vanished, and the fact that the room is tilted sideways. There are signs of life everywhere, signs that the girl has made the walker – or at least this part of it – her home. He spots various scrapped parts from both old Imperial and Rebel ships, one of them being a repurposed part of an old X-Wing that works as a work bench, and a small bench that is made of a part of a TIE bomber's wing. There's an old Rebel pilot helmet on a makeshift shelf, right next to an unmobile Imperial mouse droid.

And then he sees the wall, and he freezes.

There, on the wall behind the girl, are scratch marks. Tiny, _tiny_ scratch marks, in neat rows, stacking from floor to ceiling. He cannot help but stare at them, uncomprehending, as his mind tries to count how many of those tiny marks there are.

"Five thousand, three hundred and forty four", the girl murmurs.

Ren blinks, and turns to give a confused look at the girl. She's still staring at the part she is fixing. "What?"

"The marks", the girl tells him. "That's how many there are. Five thousand, three hundred and forty four. It's the equivalent of... about fourteen standard galactic years."

She gives out a small sound of success and snaps the small panel on the mechanical part shut. She looks at the part with a satisfied expression, then tosses it aside into a pile with of other parts. She then reaches for another one from a different pile, turns the part around for a moment before opening a hatch and setting to work again.

She's a scavenger, Ren realises, and the marks are days.

"It's missing a few", she explains as she pries the small maintenance hatch open and peers inside the part. "I didn't... I lost count before I moved in here. Couldn't keep it down anywhere but my head."

How has the girl not lost her mind? Isn't she _lonely_?

Ren pushes this thought aside and swallows, realising he is thirsty. He eyes the small water container the girl has provided him with, and decides to take the risk of drinking it. He still doesn't know what her intentions are, but he doubts one of them is poisoning him. She has clearly gone through the trouble to bring him into her home from where he had lost consciousness.

How did she even managed that?

"My ship?" he asks her curtly, worried that it might be in pieces, that it is somewhere too far away for him to return to it.

"A few hundred feet from here", she replies, narrowing her eyes at the part she is fixing. "Busted your stabilisers. Otherwise, the ship is fine. Can't fly in atmosphere though, not without those stabilisers."

She pauses, her frown deepening, and suddenly she snaps the small panel she had opened and tosses the part aside. For the first time since Ren awoke the girl turns to look at him. She looks hesitant, he realises, as if she is not used to speaking with another person.

"I... can maybe help you with that", she tells him. "There's a downed Star Destroyer nearby. It's been stripped of most of the valuable parts, but there's a TIE fighter hangar full of old fighters, with fully functional stabilisers. No one bothers with them, they're not valuable enough since the fighters themselves cannot fly. From what I saw when I took a look at your ship, the stabilisers haven't changed since the older model, and can be swapped into yours."

Ren tilts his head slightly, curiosity rearing its head. This is the most the girl has said to him thus far, and all that just to offer him help?

 _Why?_

"How long would that take?" he asks instead.

The girl hums thoughtfully, unconsciously mimicking his movement as she tilts her head to one side. "A day, maybe two. Depends on..."

She trails off, her gaze shifting away from him uneasily.

"Depends on...?" he prods.

The girl is still hesitating, and she bites her bottom lip. Then she comes to some sort of a conclusion and turns to look at him again. All of her previous hesitation is gone from her face.

"Are you a Jedi?"

He starts at her question, feels the bubbling simmer of his anger begin to rise, but before he can snap at the girl, or do something worse than that, she is talking again.

"Your sword", she explains. "Saw it when I found you."

Ah, yes, that would explain the question, wouldn't it? His anger subsides, for now, and he finally realises the girl truly has no idea who he is, _what_ he is capable of.

"You do not have to be a Jedi to carry lightsabers.", he replies, his voice controlled, low. It's not an outright denial, nor a confirmation, and he isn't exactly sure _why_ he isn't telling her who he is.

Curiosity, he realises as soon as he thinks that. His damned curiosity.

She seems to slump slightly at his response. "Oh... right. I just... I heard stories that Jedi could... _move_ things. It might've made acquiring the stabilisers a little easier."

Ren very nearly chuckles out loud. What an odd way of looking at things. She doesn't care for his motives, his allegiance, or who he is. Or at least, she didn't appear to. Her only concern seems to be whether or not the repairs of his ship could be made any faster. It's... kind of refreshing, actually.

Thankfully, he can still help her out there.

"You also do not have to be a Jedi to be capable of the same things", he tells her.

Her eyes seem to light up, and he can very nearly sense her excitement even without tapping into the Force.

"A day it is then", she tells him, nodding. "If we go now, you _could_ , in theory, be off Jakku by nightfall."

He raises an eyebrow. Is she serious?

But of course she is. She is a scavenger, and by the look of things she knows how to both dismantle _and_ repair ships, with minimal tools, if any at all. That is a useful skill, one that could, perhaps, be put to good use.

But he is thinking too much ahead of himself. His first priority must be repairing his ship, finding out whether or not Dameron and the traitor survived, and making sure Hux keeps him updated on the situation regarding the missing BB unit.

-o-o-o-

It takes them an hour to get to the Star Destroyer she mentioned. Rey had grabbed all of her usual supplies, packed some extra water just in case, since there were two of them, and dug out something for the man to protect his face and eyes with. He had seemed surprised at first, until she had explained to him how harsh the desert could be if one did not have proper protection.

She is amazed that he isn't melting in his black outfit, but it seems its properties somehow keep most of the desert heat away. She isn't still certain of who he is, what side he is on, and his cryptic answers to her inquiries regarding the Jedi confuse her. She wonders, as she leads him inside the mountainous bulk of the downed Star Destroyer, whose side this man actually is on. She doesn't dare ask him, feels that it isn't her business anyway. But if he _is_ a Jedi, like she had initially thought, she supposes he would like to keep that particular information a secret. She isn't stupid. She has heard of the First Order, of the Rebellion, and the lack of Jedi in the galaxy. If rumours of a Jedi would begin to spread, the First Order would be quickly on said Jedi's trail.

Either way, Rey feels compelled to help him, despite not knowing exactly who he is. It doesn't matter to her, really. She committed to helping him the moment she dragged him inside her AT-AT. The fact that he hasn't shown any hostility towards her so far has chased the last remaining doubts of her decision out of her mind.

The man is silent. She doesn't mind that. She's not used to talking with strangers, keeping her interactions with other people to a bare minimum. The only person she ever really talks to is Unkar Plutt, and even that she does out of pure necessity.

That reminds her that she should check if she can find anything else to salvage while she looks for the stabilisers. Her haul from the previous day was better than she has had in weeks, and Plutt had rewarded her with enough food portions to last for a few days. Still, it would not hurt to look, right?

She removes the scarf she uses to keep the desert heat away from her face as soon as they are in the shadowy depths of the Star Destroyer. She breathes in the dry, cool air and momentarily closes her eyes. Even though scavenging is a necessity to her, she has grown oddly _fond_ of doing so. Every trip is an adventure, every find an exhilarating treasure that others have overlooked.

Rey thrives for adventure. It is the only way she has survived her loneliness all these years.

She pushes these thoughts aside and focuses on her surroundings. The entryway into the Star Destroyer she has used isn't too far from where she needs to be. It's easy to navigate inside the massive ship, its insides having mostly collapsed years ago, mostly due to the initial damage from the battle that downed all the ships on Jakku. A few rooms remain intact, and miraculously the TIE fighter hangar is one of those.

The problem isn't getting to it. It is the fact that once they get in there, the actual fighters will be docked a few hundred feet _above_ them.

"This way", she says quietly, her voice hushed, wary of making too much noise in in the large space. Desert creatures sometimes make their homes in the bellies of the huge ships, and the less of an echo she makes, the better.

She does not look at the man behind her as she begins to make her way towards their destination, but she knows by some instinct that he is following her. He moves silently, stealthily, like he is completely at home in the shadows of the ancient ship, but still she is keenly aware of his presence behind her. Oddly enough his silent presence behind her does not make her uncomfortable, merely reassured that if something _would_ jump at them, she doesn't have to face it alone.

The hangar door is half collapsed. There is a large crack in it ten or so feet above them, but it is a tricky climb. She assesses the wall critically, looking for an alternate way of entry. Another, much smaller crack is at the ground level five feet to their left. It is large enough for a person to pass through, but there is fallen debris on the other side, blocking the way.

She sighs wearily, turning to asses the wall again, when the man beside her moves towards the smaller crack. She tilts her head curiously at him, wondering what he is planning. He eyes the debris for a moment, then briefly closes his eyes before he lifts his right hand.

There is... something in the air. Rey has no idea what it is, and has no time to ponder it further when the sound of creaking metal draws her gaze to the crack. In front of her eyes the fallen debris is moving, bending in on itself, drawing away from the previously blocked path.

When the man lowers his hand Rey can do nothing but stare in amazement before moving to inspect the path.

"What did you _do_?" she asks, fascinated, her voice barely above a whisper.

The man's only response is a faint upwards twitch of his lips.

Rey shakes her head, still amazed at how easily he had moved such a large amount of solid metal with barely lifting a finger. She wonders, again, if he is, indeed, a Jedi and is simply unwilling to give her a straight answer. Her amazement fuels her on as she finally makes her way into the old hangar, mesmerised by the fact that she does not have to repeat the difficult climb she has previously had to go through when she has been here.

The hangar is slightly darker than the spacious room they had come from. Rey is used to it though, and can work with the minimal light that comes from the few tears in the ship's hull. The hangar's outer blast doors are closed, and miraculously they have survived the crash nearly intact, blocking any access to the hangar from that direction. The room is tilted slightly, in a very awkward position if she is brutally honest, and as she recalled the fighters are above them rather than in the same level.

She looks at the support beams, assesses the walls, and ponders.

"I need to get up there", she says out loud, sharing the plan that she has already formed in her mind with the man she is helping. "Once I've done that, I'm going to find a pair of undamaged stabilisers – your ship needs two of them – and then I'm going to detach and drop them since they're too heavy to carry down. Can you, err..."

She pauses, looking for the right words. She has no idea how his powers work, how large objects he is capable of moving.

"Catch them and set them down?" he asks her, not quite able to hide the amusement from his tone.

"Yes", she responds, relieved that he understood what she was trying to say. "So, can you?"

He nods in agreement. "That will not be a problem."

She gives him a brisk nod and prepares her climbing gear. It's not much really, just a grappling cable she has salvaged years ago from a downed Hammerhead cruiser. She uses it to secure herself as she climbs higher, relying on her ability to climb a nearly vertical wall with minimal space for her fingers and toes to hold on to. She loops the cable across her shoulder, makes sure it is secure, and approaches the wall as her eyes sweep it for purchase. She tilts her head backwards, planning her movements ahead, playing a pantomime with her hands as she memorises which moves she needs to make in which order.

Then, she closes her eyes, focuses for the briefest of moments, breathing in and out in a steady rhythm.

On the last exhale, she moves. She pounces on the wall, letting years and years of instinct direct her movements as she scales it with little to no effort. A few minutes later she reaches her first stop, twenty feet above the level where she had started. She secures the cable there, attaching the loose end to her belt that doubles as a climbing harness, and then she is off again, climbing, pausing on secure platforms, assessing her situation, planning and climbing some more. She loses all sense of time, only focusing on getting to the docked TIE fighters as quickly and safely as possible. She forgets, as she climbs, why she is doing it, forgets the man waiting down below, her earlier thoughts on who he actually is. Nothing exists for her but the climb and the goal she has set, as she knows that any stray thoughts, any slips in concentration, could potentially be fatal.

She doesn't know how long it takes to the top, but when she does she takes a brief moment to celebrate by perching on top of the docking beams that keep the TIE fighters securely in their places. She attatches her grappling cable, and only then glances down to see the distance she has covered.

The man in the dark clothing waits patiently below, his face upturned, a pale speck in all the shadows. He has moved to lean against the wall, his arms crossed in front of her as he watches and waits for her to finish her task. She gives him a small, satisfied smirk, even though she knows he cannot see it.

And then she gets to work. The fighter closest to her proves to be a bust, its stabilisers damaged beyond repair, so she moves over to the next one. This one has a shattered cockpit window, and she sees someone has stripped its insides of all useful parts. She can see, however, that it was done a long time ago, and she suspects no one has bothered with the fighters since.

No one comes to the parts of Graveyard Rey frequents. Perhaps she will return here later to take a closer look.

The TIE fighter she is examining has a busted left stabiliser, but the one on the right is undamaged. She makes sure she has a secure perch before she begins to detach it. It's not a particularly large part when it's retracted, nor difficult to get loose, but it _is_ heavy.

Two minutes of careful cutting, tugging and unplugging, and Rey gives a warning call that echoes eerily in the otherwise quiet hangar. She watches the stabiliser drop through the air, and stop abruptly in mid-air. She glances towards the man in the dark clothes and notes that he is holding his hand upwards again as he lowers the stabiliser to the ground.

She grins and moves on. The next TIE is missing most of its wings, but thankfully the stabilisers are intact and she works quickly to detach the left side stabiliser. One warning shout later, and the piece falls to the ground, once again stopping in mid-air before floating back to the ground slowly. Rey makes one final glance around, notes that the fighter has a cockpit full of goodies she can salvage at a later time, and makes her way back to the point where she attached her grappling cable.

She'll use it to descend this time, and leave it where it is. It is long enough for her to reach the floor from all the way up here, and it'll save her from climbing back up again on her next salvage trip. After all, people never come to these parts of the Graveyard, so there is no worry of someone else using it instead of her.

-o-o-o-

Kylo Ren has seen many things, but he has to admit the efficiency and precision with which this scavenger girl works is something else.

He is not truly a mechanic himself, but he did dabble in his youth, before it became clear that his Force sensitivity had meant him for far greater things. It is this knowledge that makes him able to appreciate the girl's skills as she works on his fighter with only minimal tools. The help she requires from him is minimal, namely lifting the heavy stabilisers in place with the Force and keeping them there while she reconnects the wires and properly attatches the pieces where they are supposed to be.

She tells him it'll be enough to get him out of the atmosphere. He plans on having a mechanic replace the stabilisers with new ones as soon as he gets back to the Star Destroyer in orbit, but he can see that she is doing a commendable work on her own.

He has to seriously consider picking her up to work as a mechanic for the First Order as soon as the business with the missing droid and the escaped Poe Dameron is dealt with.

He had signalled Hux in orbit while the two of them were in the downed Star Destroyer earlier. Hux had shown mild concern that Ren had taken so long to inform of his whereabouts, but he had assured the General that his ship was merely having a minor malfunction. The search for the droid, according to Hux, was not going too well. They had also tracked the heat signature of the TIE fighter Poe Dameron had stolen to the opposite side of the small scavenger outpost nearby, but were unable to determine whether or not Dameron and the traitorous Stormtrooper had survived the crash.

He had told the General to focus on finding the droid. He could take a detour himself to examine the crash site for any signs of life before getting out of the planet.

Night is beginning to fall when the scavenger girl tells him the stabilisers are in place. She asks him to get into the cockpit and try to extend them so that she can make sure the repairs are working as intended. They are, thankfully, and the girl makes her way down and comes to stand just outside the open cockpit of the TIE Silencer.

"Well", she says, a satisfied look on her face. "That's that done then. You're good to go."

"I appreciate it", he tells her sincerely. Though he normally does not concern himself with the needs of others, this time he makes an exception. "Is there anything I can do for you before I leave?"

She falters, glancing down at the ground awkwardly. "Er... That fighter of yours wouldn't happen to have food rations in it? That's... The only thing I really need, to be honest."

He is surprised by this, but realises that helping him has taken her the whole day. He guesses she would have normally been scavenging for herself so that she can sell the parts she finds at the outpost. His fighter does, in fact, have a small amount of food rations, and he does not hesitate to part with them.

"Thanks", she says, flashing him a small grin. "Well, have a safe flight."

She is stepping away from the fighter now, but before she can get very far he makes a decision and speaks up again.

"Wait", he calls. "I didn't ask your name."

She looks mildly surprised, having not expected that. Neither of them has asked one another's name during the whole day, but if he will recruit her later he would rather be at least this much informed.

"Er... Rey", she says, looking a bit flustered. "I'm Rey."

He gives her a faint smile. "Thank you, Rey. I will not forget this."

She nods at him and retreats, heading back to her AT-AT. Ren closes the cockpit and begins the take-off sequence. He picks up his helmet, exactly where he had dropped it. After a moment of staring at it, puts it back on. He finds, to his surprise, that he is somewhat glad that Rey did not see him in his helmet, that their first interaction was not based on her knowledge of who he truly is. It gave him a truthful insight to her personality, and saved him from the mild humiliation of having to call General Hux to have a shuttle pick him up because his stabilisers got busted.

He heads towards the coordinates Hux supplied him with. After one last mental note to recruit the girl later, he pushes all thoughts aside. He has an escaped prisoner and a traitor to find.

* * *

 _ **AN:**_ I have no idea where I'm going with this, but here, have a setting that demanded to be written. xD  
Apologies for any possible OOC-ness, I'm still trying to grasp what these characters are all about.


	2. They Flee

**DISCLAIMER:  
** **I own nothing. I'm merely playing with the characters in the sandbox that is my imagination.**

 **Parts of the dialogue were borrowed from _The Force Awakens_.**

* * *

 _"Trusting is hard. Knowing who to trust, even harder."  
_ \- Maria V. Snyder

* * *

 **2.**

 **They Flee**

* * *

When Kylo Ren heard the missing BB unit was seen in the presence of a girl, he knew.

She had been sighted with the droid _and_ the traitor, and they had fled Jakku on board of the _Millenium Falcon_ , no less. They had destroyed the TIE fighter squadron that had been sent after them by flying inside one of the ancient Star Destroyers, navigating through the downed ships scattered across the scorching desert and evading seemingly everything Hux had thrown at them.

And Ren simply _knew_. It didn't matter _how_ he knew. He just did.

Rey.

Now, they are headed to the Mid Rim planet of Takodana. One of their spies there had informed the missing BB unit had been sighted in the presence of three humans and one wookiee. Somewhere along the way they had ran into none other than Han Solo.

His _father_.

Ren knew she was with him and the wookiee, as Supreme Leader Snoke himself had revealed this information to him. Still, hearing the spy's report had angered him, for though he did not doubt his Master's word, he had, deep down, wanted those news to be false.

Anger still simmers within him as they approach the planet, because he does not trust himself to feel anything else. He had decided to go himself, both because he does not trust Hux to get the job done and because the Supreme Leader had trusted this mission to him. But Ren is certain that he would succeed in obtaining the map the droid carried, one way or another. His anger at the knowledge that his father is there only serves to fuel his determination.

So, when his shuttle lands he wastes no time marching down onto the planet's surface. He takes great delight in the volatile hum of his lightsaber as he deflects bolts shot towards him, and in cutting down those foolish enough to stand in his way. The droid is his priority, and though perhaps he could speed the battle up by taking part in it, the Stormtroopers are there purely for distraction while _he_ takes care of his own mission.

And then, he senses it, a flicker in the Force, drawing his attention like a beacon. For a moment he wonders about the awakening in the Force that his Master had briefly mentioned – the awakening that Ren himself had also sensed, but he discards this thought when his gaze finds the scavenger girl from Jakku.

The girl stands at the edge of the forest, staring at him, a blaster held uncertainly in her hand, like she does not fully know how to use it. He deflects another bolt speeding towards his head as he regards the girl for a moment, and then begins to walk through the battle field towards her.

She flees.

-o-o-o-

When Rey saw the dark figure effortlessly carve its way through the battle, she thought that perhaps she should have accepted Han Solo's offer and gotten the hell out of this strange forest planet while she still had the chance. She had taken one look at the viciously crackling red lightsaber the figure wielded before she had turned tail and ran. It wasn't so much the saber itself that made her skin crawl but the sinking feeling of dread caused by the realisation that just moments prior she had seen this same figure in that vision that had appeared when she had touched that blasted Skywalker lightsaber.

Running may have been her second mistake. She doesn't know how to flee from someone in a forest. Had it been the sand dunes of Jakku, she would have had no problem. But here, everything is green, so full of _life_ , with plants and moss and _water_ , and she is armed with a blaster she has no idea how to use.

And she can _hear_ the steady, vicious hum of the lightsaber of her pursuer. Closer, and closer, and _closer_. Panic fuels her escape. She has no idea what the terrain is like, and the vegetation makes it impossible for her to pinpoint the distance and the direction of that hum.

She stumbles, and suddenly the figure is in front of her. Startled, she fires her blaster, just like Han had told her, and watches in pure horror as the figure deflects the bolt with an almost careless flick of his blade. The next bolt the figure merely side steps, and the third one goes wide, hitting the rocks and dissipating harmlessly.

Rey turns and continues to run.

She doesn't get far when the figure suddenly emerges from the forest in front of her, hand outstretched, the red blade crackling, and her whole body freezes. She cannot move a muscle, can merely breathe and move her eyes. The figure circles her, says he has heard about her, and falls silent as he continues to walk around her with slow, measured steps.

Fear. She has never been so frightened before. She finds she can speak, her vocal cords are left unfrozen by the invisible force that keeps the rest of her immobile, but no sound comes out of her. The figure comes back around to face her, his masked face far too close to hers. He says something but she cannot focus, can only hear the hum of the lightsaber, cannot even hear if he is speaking to her, cannot concentrate on _anything_ but that hum.

It appears right next to her face. She whimpers, now beyond merely frightened. She is _terrified_. She can feel the heat of the blade vaporise moisture off of her skin, can feel it make the tears that involuntarily leak from her eyes vanish before they have even properly formed. There is an odd pressure in the air, but she cannot even focus on that with the lightsaber so close to her face.

"The map", the masked figure's words come from behind the mask, distorted, far more inhuman than she anticipated. The words sound... surprised? "You've _seen_ it!"

A gloved hand appears in front of her face and suddenly there is pain. Pain in her head, so intense that she fears it might explode. She cries out, feels her body want to convulse but still her muscles will not move. Memories flash through her mind, she realises, too fast for her to see them, too fast to understand what is going on.

Suddenly the red blade retreats, as does the pain in her head, and she can hear a Stormtrooper address the figure. With the blade gone, her brains finally register the horrifying realisation she has been trying to deny for the past few minutes.

This is Kylo Ren. The most feared commander of the the First Order. A figure even the scavengers of Jakku have heard of, whom is spoken of in the barest of whispers as if mere mention of him will make him appear, and whose very name inspires terror in anyone remotely aware of the First Order and its struggle with the Resistance.

And she is now in his clutches, with no way of escaping.

"Pull the division out", she hears him say as he approaches her again. "Forget the droid. We have what we need."

She has a brief moment to feel a strange heaviness in the air before her whole world turns black.

-o-o-o-

Kylo Ren watches the girl in contemplation. He has kept her unconscious for several hours, and knows that her awakening will take a moment. She will awaken soon, now that he is no longer influencing her state of awareness with the Force. But he is patient, though usually patience is not his forte. The girl has the knowledge he needs, the missing half of the map that will lead him to Skywalker.

He ponders the approach he should take. Normally he would simply force the information out of her head, like he did in the forest of Takodana, in the heat of the moment of realising this girl has what he needs. But the fact remains that he knows her. She _helped_ him on Jakku, though at the time she had no idea of his true identity.

She had thought him to be a _Jedi_.

He has no idea what to do with her. He has to get the information, this much he is aware of, but he still wants her skills at the disposal of the First Order. The true question is whether or not her mind has been twisted too far into believing the Resistance is a better option. The traitor, FN-2187, would perhaps be eager to jump into the same boat with them. The droid obviously trusts her enough to show her the map, perhaps it even believes she would help it get to the Resistance.

And then there is Han Solo and Chewbacca, and who knows what the two of _them_ have told her.

He really hates this situation. Hates that he will potentially lose the formidable skills of the girl in the process of getting what he wants, hates that he already may have done so with the hastiness with which he tried to pry the information from her on Takodana. _Hates_ that he feels this way about a mere _scavenger_ from _Jakku_.

But, she helped him even though she didn't need to. When was the last time someone helped him just because they _wanted_ to?

He doesn't know. It has been a long time, so long that he would rather not think about it. He is used to ordering people to aid him, and he never asks help with his personal matters. To require help is to have a weakness, and Kylo Ren does _not_ want to be weak.

The girl stirs and his attention turns to her. He says nothing, speaks nothing, just waits and watches, determined to remain silent until she realises the situation she is in.

He still has no idea what to do.

-o-o-o-

Rey comes back to her senses with a small groan. Her head is pounding, her body oddly sluggish and unresponsive. Artificial light is bright in her eyes and she hisses, hating the brightness already.

And then she sees the figure in dark clothing and that terrifying mask and she freezes. At the same time she realises she is restrained, strapped into some sort of a metal slab... table... _something_. She is no longer on Takodana, but in a room of black and metal and faintly blinking lights.

And the figure just watches her from across the room, making her skin crawl uneasily. She parts her lips, fighting back a shiver, refusing to show just how frightened she is. To show fear is to have a weakness, and a scavenger _cannot_ afford to be weak. This she has learned from early childhood, ever since she was four years old and was left in the hands of Unkar Plutt.

"Where am I?" she asks out loud, her voice quiet, but surprisingly unwavering.

The figure tilts its head slightly, regarding her in silence before answering.

"You are my guest", it – _he_ – says, his voice distorted and inhuman through the mask. It is a terrifying voice, now that she is not distracted from it by the hum of a volatile lightsaber next to her head. And this time she cannot quite suppress her shiver.

"Where are the others?" she asks, subtly trying to tug on the restraints that hold her wrists down.

They do not budge.

"You mean the murderers, traitors and thieves you call friends?" he asks her indifferently. "You'll be relieved to hear that I have no idea."

She stares at him, still terrified, but also curious as to what he intends to do. She hates being restrained like this, hates how easily he overpowered her in the forest, how there was _nothing_ she could do to stop him. She doesn't like this, doesn't like _him_ just _standing there_ and _watching_.

"You still want to kill me", he tells her, tilting his head, sounding vaguely... amused?

 _Kill_ is a rather strong word, but she is distracted from it by the anger that flares within her. Is he somehow reading her thoughts? How _dare_ he! "That's what happens when you're being hunted by a creature in a mask."

There is a moment of silence, during which the figure – damn it, _Kylo Ren_ – straightens himself. What he does next catches her completely by surprise. He reaches for his mask, presses a concealed button, and it clicks open with a few mechanical clicks and whirrs and a small hiss of air. The scavenger in her rears its head in curiosity, wanting to instantly figure out the mechanism behind it.

And then she sees his face and she is stunned, forgetting the workings of the mask. Her eyes widened slightly, her mind scrambling to understand what is going on here.

"Hello, Rey."

No. No. No no no no –

He places the mask on a small desk beside him. It settles on its surface with an ominous, metallic thud, but she barely notices, her gaze fixed on the man's face. He's the same man she helped on Jakku, a mere day before she ran into BB-8. An aching realisation hits her as she realises how wrong her initial guesses about his identity were.

" _You do not have to be a Jedi to carry lightsabers._ _"_

He is definitely _no_ Jedi.

"Tell me about the droid", he says, his voice a low rumble, soft in comparison to the harsh distortion caused by his mask.

Rey narrows her eyes, her surprise melting away as her earlier anger rears its head. Does he honestly think she will voluntarily tell him anything after dragging her to wherever she is being held right now? No. She will most definitely _not_. She does not _trust_ him. Not like she trusts her new friends. Hell, she has never _had_ friends, as far as she knows, and though her plan _had_ been to go back to Jakku...

She swallows and takes a nervous breath, tries to suppress her racing thoughts. Thinking about Jakku and how long she has been away will not help her right now. She doesn't really know _what_ will help her, but she is far too stubborn for her own good to betray her friends. All she can do is try stalling until she can come up with... what, exactly? An escape plan?

It's a far fetched thought, and truthfully not a very feasible one, but she has to try anyway. She doesn't really think she has any other choice.

"He's a BB unit with selenium drive and a thermal hyperscan vindicator –"

"He's carrying a section of a navigational chart", Kylo Ren interrupts her. "We have the rest, recovered from archives of the Empire. We need the last piece."

Rey shuts her mouth and realises she cannot play ignorant. Kylo Ren knows exactly what he wants from her. He downright _radiates_ an aura of certainty that by the end of their discussion he will have what he wants. It's that, together with what happened on Takodana, that makes it difficult for her to mesh this man with the one whose stabilisers she fixed on Jakku. They're too... different. _That_ man did not try to hurt her, despite the numerous opportunities he had been presented with. _This_ one, however...

She supposes this one will kill her, if she does not give him what he wants.

But, she is persistent. And stubborn. Mostly just stubborn. Especially when pressed to do something against her will.

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Oh, but you do", he tells her, taking a step closer. "I know the droid is the reason why you left Jakku. I _know_ you have seen the map. Somehow, you convinced the droid to show it to you. _You_. A _scavenger_."

Rey narrows her eyes. "Insulting me will hardly make me cooperate."

That earns her a small, faintly amused chuckle. "No. I don't suppose it will."

He watches her again, pondering. She has no idea what's going through his mind, but he seems to come into some sort of a conclusion when he takes a small step back and makes a small, almost careless flick with his hand.

Her restraints snap open. She bolts up on her feet, backing away, to the opposite side of the room, until her back is pressed against the wall. It's not ideal, not even very useful, all things considered, but she wants as much space between herself and Kylo Ren as the small interrogation room provides. He's watching her retreat with faint amusement, and she frowns.

What is he planning? _Why_ did he release her?

"I have no intention of hurting you", he tells her. "Not if you give me what I want. I just need the map. Nothing more, nothing less."

Rey still doesn't trust him. Doesn't trust _this_ , him releasing her just like that. It goes against _everything_ she has heard of Kylo Ren, against each and every one of her own conclusions she has made since Takodana. What is he trying to prove? That she is _safe_?

She hasn't felt safe since... She doesn't even know. Even her AT-AT, though secure, had never felt _completely_ safe.

"And after?" she asks instead, her voice full of suspicion. "What happens after?"

Her answer comes in the form of a small shrug. "That is entirely up to you."

She knows that is a lie. It _has_ to be. She'll be kept imprisoned until she is no longer useful. Maybe they'll force her to work for them, maybe they'll keep her for amusement. But she knows for damn sure that they will _not_ let her go, even if she'd just want to get back to Jakku. Too much of a risk that she might run to the Resistance instead, to tell them everything she has learned during her imprisonment.

Which, to be honest, is starting to sound like a very tempting idea.

"Why would you help them?" Kylo Ren suddenly asks, breaking the momentary silence, startling her with the accuracy with which he answers to her thoughts. "The Resistance is nothing but strangers to you. You do not know them, what they are capable of. Why believe the stories of how good and righteous they are? Why believe their lies?"

Rey scowls. Why _shouldn't_ she believe them? At least _they_ haven't taken her prisoner, tried to interrogate her for the contents of some map that she hasn't got a clue how to even read. Besides, BB-8 was desperate. So was Finn. And Han and Chewie too, once they got over their little misunderstanding about the _Falcon_. And they were _friendly_ , even though they didn't need to.

When was the last time someone was friendly towards her just because they _wanted_ to?

She doesn't know. What she _does_ know, however, is that Kylo Ren is definitely _not_ friendly just because he _wants_ to. No, he wants the map. What she doesn't get is why he's making attempts at earning her trust all of a sudden. He didn't seem too keen on that approach on Takodana.

"Why are you doing this?" she asks, the question slipping out of her mouth before she can reconsider asking it.

He regards her with a slightly tilted head, his expression now completely blank. Just how much of her thoughts did he just catch?

"I have my orders", he finally replies.

Rey raises an eyebrow. Now _that_ is dodging a question if she has ever heard one. Perhaps it's knowing he doesn't want to answer that makes her bold enough to keep talking.

"And do you always follow your orders?"

He narrows his eyes, and Rey realises, too late, that she has gone too far.

"The map", he tells her, his soft tone now hardened with an icy edge. He's slowly approaching her now, and Rey makes an attempt to scramble further back. But she is already in a corner, and in the small room there is no real way of getting away.

Suddenly she really _cannot_ get away. There's that strange heaviness in the air and her muscles freeze in place. She flinches, recalling the terror she had felt on Takodana when he had done this to her the first time. There's no viciously crackling lightsaber this time to draw her attention, however, so all she can do is watch with increasing fright as Kylo Ren slowly approaches her.

"It does not need to be this difficult", he tells her, his voice a soft murmur.

"I'm not telling you anything", Rey hisses through clenched teeth, trying to mask her fear with anger.

"You don't have to", he murmurs to her, and he is so close now. Close enough to touch her if he would so choose. "You know I can take whatever I want."

He raises his gloved hand and Rey recoils in memory of the pain of having her mind probed, her memories torn from her subconsciousness. She tries to move away from him, to avoid the inevitable, but she can't. The invisible power forces her to remain still.

His fingers nearly touch her and the heaviness in the air lifts for the briefest of moments. She feels a sudden brush of power wash over her, so different from anything she has ever experienced. She stares, trying to figure out what it is, why it feels so _familiar_...

And then there is pain and she twitches, clenching her eyes shut. Why is he _doing_ this to her? Why did she not just stay on Jakku...

Flashes of memories in her head again. Of the many days and many nights spent on the desert planet, of the longing with which she always gazed at the stars, of the rows upon rows upon rows of tiny little marks on the wall, one more appearing beside the last after each passing day... And then, when it became too much, she imagined...

A spray of sea salt on her face. A soft breeze, then a violent one, and soft again, ruffling her hair, filling her ears with a steady hum. The birds, all over the place, small, round, soft with so many feathers, white and red and orange and black...

"You're so lonely... So afraid to leave", he murmurs and her eyes snap open, automatically focusing on him, drawn by his soft voice. He gives her a faint smile. "At night, desperate to sleep... you imagine an ocean. I see it – I see the island..."

No no no no. He is _not_ taking that memory from her!

But she cannot truly resist and he tears into the memory of the island she used to dream about, the island and its strange birds that have been her only companions on all those nights on Jakku when loneliness was becoming too much for her to bear. The memory shatters in her mind as he peruses all of its details, the fragments turning into white hot shards that send a sensation both searing hot and burning cold through her. She winces, her body refusing to comply to a movement much stronger than that, and she feels the sting of tears forming in her eyes. But she doesn't want to cry, so she does what she can in an attempt to distract herself from the pain.

"Why are you _doing_ this!" she asks out loud, her voice raspy, tinted by the pain.

"I told you that I must", he answers her, _his_ voice still infuriatingly soft. "The pain will stop when you give me what I need."

She's openly crying now, unable to stop the tears, but she doesn't really care anymore. She just wants this to stop, wants to get away from this. But the invisible force still holds her firmly, and the needling pain in her head remains. And she is too damn stubborn to tell her captor anything. She's _always_ been too damn stubborn. She wants to get back to her friends, back to the moment before she stormed into the forest.

She should have taken Han's offer...

"Han Solo", Kylo Ren remarks, with a hint of contempt in his voice. "You feel like he's the father you never had. He would've disappointed you."

Rey opens her eyes and glares, furious. How dare he? How. _Dare_. He? The brush of power returns, and her anger momentarily overrides her pain. Who is he to judge her? She has never known her parents, has never had the approval of anyone. Only loneliness, the cold blanket of abandonment. How _dare_ he judge her for wanting to have that from Han, from the only person in her life who has _complimented_ her for who she _is_ , not merely for what she can _do_?

"Get out of my head", she hisses, jaw clenched, eyes flashing, her survival instinct finally kicking in and making her fight back.

But of course he does not pull away. Instead, he leans closer. The power around her swirls, growing, intensifying, as if his mere presence makes it gather around her. He is watching her, thoughtfully, imploringly, and with a hint of... what, exactly?

Recognition?

 _Understanding?_

She has no idea.

"I know you've seen the map", he tells her, his tone more commanding than before. "It's in there... and now you'll give it to me. When you do, this will stop. The pain will go away."

She narrows her eyes, distrustful. The power is still there, in her, _around_ her, helping her cope with the needling sensation of having her mind violently probed against her will. She has no idea where the power is coming from, but she is _glad_ for it. He looks at her, the small smile from a moment ago very nearly returning, the strange look in his eyes intensifying. They're so dark, his eyes. She never really noticed it before, until now when she can do nothing _but_ look straight at them.

"Don't be afraid", he tells her, his soft tone a complete contrast to the agony he is causing her. "I feel it too."

He thinks she fears this thrum of power she feel? Why would she...

Oh. _Oh!_

She realises then what the power is, understands exactly what she is dealing with. She goes back to the moment in the forest, to the pressure in the air when he stunned her, knocked her unconscious. To the oppressing heaviness she felt when she travelled down into the basement of Maz's castle. The pressure she felt before and after touching the saber she found there. The pressure she felt when she helped this man with his busted stabilisers, when he _used the Force_ to clear the path into the TIE fighter hangar.

Perhaps she has known all her life, but has never admitted it. Still isn't, not fully. But she _has_ had the uncanny ability to know when a wall she is trying to climb is collapsing, when the sand she travels has become treacherous. Has known when to make that last moment leap before her perch crumbles from under her, how to avoid the grabbing hands of the men in the outpost when she has to travel there too late during the day, when to stay out of sight of the great ocht'kai that search for unsuspecting prey on the deserts.

And she knows, in that moment, that she will _not_ give in now.

"I'm not giving you anything", she says defiantly, angrily.

Kylo Ren peers at her intently. His words, when he speaks, have a dangerous edge.

"We'll see."

She meets his gaze unflinchingly, and does the unthinkable. She reaches out to the power she feels around her and _forces_ it to do as she wants. The pressure in her mind increases, but she answers that pressure only by pulling more of the power around her. She sees him falter, sees the flicker of uncertainty in his eyes.

And suddenly it's not simply him she sees. Chaotic memories flash in her mind, but they are no longer hers. They are too much for her to focus on, too fast and too disarrayed. She feels the thrum of power, dark, seductive, and she realises it is _his_ power that she senses, that it is _his_ memories she is seeing. And from the torrent of memories, a single realisation forms.

"You..." she starts, straining to focus, to form a coherent sentence in face of the chaotic memories she sees. "... You are afraid... that you will never be as strong as Darth Vader!"

The whirlwind of memories slams to a sudden halt when Kylo Ren pushes her out of his mind. She gasps, her eyes wide, disbelieving of what she just did. But then her gaze focuses on him again as he stumbles back and her gaze steels. She is still angry. Angry and confused and _betrayed_.

He flees.

* * *

 _ **AN:**_ I _still_ have no idea where I'm going with this. But at least I'm getting an idea of how I want to write this. xD


	3. On the Precipice of Change

**DISCLAIMER:  
** **I own nothing. I'm merely playing with the characters in the sandbox that is my imagination.**

 **Parts of the dialogue were borrowed from _The Force Awakens_.**

* * *

 _"Fear doesn't shut you down; it wakes you up."  
_ – Veronica Roth

* * *

 **3.**

 **On the Precipice of Change**

* * *

Rey has no idea how she managed to escape. How she has avoided detection thus far. How Kylo Ren has not yet found her. The power from before is still tingling across her skin, buzzing in her awareness, whispering to her, lending her strength and a clarity of mind she has never experienced before.

Tricking the Stormtrooper tasked with securing her back to the interrogation table to let her go instead had been oddly easy. Having him drop his blaster for her to pick up had, _also_ , been easy. Avoiding the patrols now looking for her...

Well, she is nothing if not resourceful. She knows she cannot use the same trick on the patrols, has no idea how to focus the power at her fingertips so precisely, doesn't really even know _how_ she made it work with the one Stormtrooper in the first place. But that's OK. She has survived years as a scavenger, scaling walls of fallen Star Destroyers, avoiding death with every leap from one perch to another.

Scaling the wall down from the walkway leading to the TIE fighter hangar in order to reach the service hatch is no problem for her. The hatch is easy to open, it's not even locked. On the other side, she continues to climb, blessedly out of sight of the patrols. She focuses on nothing but the climb, nothing but reaching the next stable perch. It comes to her naturally, after years and years of practice, the plotting, the moving, the climbing and descending. Nothing exists for her in that moment, nothing but getting to the goal she has set for herself. The exit. Her escape route. She doesn't even know how she knows to move towards it, but she does so anyway, letting her hands and feet carry her towards it, out of sight, a shadow in between the lights on the wall.

Another service hatch, another unlocked door, and Rey is back on the other side, the side she started from. For the briefest of moments she entertains the incredulous – and admittedly hilarious – though that _someone_ ought to tell the First Order just how poor their security is in these areas. But she does not focus on that thought for long. Instead she pauses for the briefest of moments, listens, and moves again, certain that the walkway above her is empty. She climbs, up, up, _up_ , and reaches the walkway, undetected. She glances around, pauses to listen, knees slightly bent, ready to flee.

No one has spotted her and the corridor is blissfully empty, so she moves on. When she rounds the corner she runs into Han, Chewie and Finn. Relief, surprise and disbelief war inside her mind.

How?

 _Why?_

Han clasps her shoulder, gently, looking at her face with a crinkle of worry at the corners of his eyes. "Are you alright?"

She manages a shaky breath and a nod, tension from fleeing alone dissipating from her body. "Yeah."

"Good", Han says, nodding as he lets go of her shoulder.

"What happened?" Finn asks then, his tone worried for her. _For her!_ "Did he hurt you?"

Rey suppresses a flinch. Years as a scavenger forbid her from showing a weakness. These are her friends, but old habits are hard to break, and she wants to appear strong.

"Finn. What are you doing here?" she asks him instead, deflecting his question, not trusting her reactions enough to answer.

"We came back for you."

She gapes, stares, her gaze intently on Finn. She glances at Han, then Chewie, and she cannot believe it. They came back. _For her_.

No one has ever come back for her.

She cannot help the tears that spring to her eyes.

-o-o-o-

Kylo Ren is _furious_. The girl has escaped. The guard he had left her with is nowhere to be found. She has realised the power within her and is now testing its limits. Every moment that passes will make her bolder, stronger, more knowledgeable of what, exactly, she is capable of.

He should have secured her to the interrogation table himself.

Stupid, stupid, stupid, _stupid_ –!

Anger simmers. Ren cannot let her escape. He _must_ find her. Snoke wants Ren to take her to him. _She_ is the awakening his Master had spoken of, the awakening that Ren himself had sensed in the Force.

But she has become a ghost, avoiding detection, avoiding even Ren himself. He can feel her energy in the Force, somewhere in the base, but he cannot pinpoint her exact location. It's as if she is shielding herself from him, warding off his attempts to find her. Clumsy and inexperienced as she may be, she is still somehow succeeding.

And then, he senses it. A presence he did not expect to feel here.

His father has arrived. Han Solo _must_ have come for the girl – for _Rey_. Hate courses through him at that thought, hate and years old jealousy that some scavenger from _Jakku_ would gain such an attention from _his father_. And in that moment Kylo Ren understands what must be done. He abandons his search for the girl for the time being, knowing that he can find her later, _after_ he has dealt with Han Solo.

He gives himself to the Force, lets it guide his steps to his destination, a squad of Stormtroopers behind him. The confrontation with Solo is his to take care of, but he knows, as certainly as he knows he will find the girl, that Solo would never come alone. It is then, as he feels the Force course through him – _around_ him – that he realises the scavenger girl is not the only reason Han Solo has arrived, that there is another motive for their presence on _Starkiller_.

This has to be the beginning of an attack run.

The oscillator is their target, and Kylo Ren's destination. He can sense his father's presence within and he knows his moment has come, the moment that the Supreme Leader has spoken of. He takes a moment to collect himself, to cloak his feelings in the anger that always simmers just beneath the surface.

He will not fail. He _must_ _not_ falter.

He gives the signal. The Stormtroopers snap to attention and the doors to the oscillator open with a low whoosh. It is dark inside – they have cut the power to the lights – but Ren does not need the light to be able to move in the dark. He steps inside, pauses, scans the structure with his eyes – with the Force – and sends the Stormtroopers to the upper levels.

The Force leads him to the lower level. He _feels_ his father's presence, _knows_ that he is close. He pauses at the railing, closing his eyes, reaching out to the Force, _sensing_...

His eyes snap open, his head turns. There. His eyes intent on his target, he moves down the stairs, moves to the vertical support beam right in front of him. He is close. _So close_. So close he can nearly _taste_ it...

But not close enough. There is a ripple in the Force and he knows his father _was_ here mere moments ago, hiding behind that beam. The space there is now empty, and Ren moves along, searching, reaching out with the Force... He sees the bridge and decides to cross, feeling the Force urge him onwards, that the bridge is where he is supposed to go.

He is nearly on the other side when he hears it.

"Ben!"

He stops, his breath hitches in his throat as the echo of that long forgotten name bounces off of the walls. The moment has come – the moment of his decision, his _trial_. Now, faced with the decision that looms in front of him, he finds his resolve faltering. He turns, slowly, deliberately, every movement measured, flawless, concealing his inner turmoil.

"Han Solo", he says, his tone even, unflinching, betraying none of his feelings. "I've been waiting for this day for a long time."

His father is hesitating, a sense of uncertainty radiating off of him through the Force.

"Take off that mask", Solo finally tells him, his voice weary. Tired. "You don't need it."

Ren very nearly scoffs. "What do you think you'll see if I do?"

Uncertainty vanishes. Han's face steels into determination as he moves forwards, towards the figure clad in black on the bridge. "The face of my son."

Ren watches his father for a moment in silence, then removes his mask for the second time that day. He pulls it off slowly, his movements controlled, betraying nothing. And then he raises his gaze to meet his father's, his face a blank mask void of emotions, and he lets the mask drop from his fingers.

It hits the bridge with a metallic clang.

He takes a small amount of pleasure from the unsettled look that passes across Han Solo's face.

"Your son is gone", he says out loud, his simmering anger colouring his tone. "He was weak and foolish, like his father. So I destroyed him."

"That's what Snoke wants you to believe", Han tells him, still determined. "But it's not true. My son is alive."

The anger is no longer simmering. It bursts to the forefront, and Kylo Ren sneers. "No. The Supreme Leader is wise."

Han moves even closer, the look upon his face stern. "Snoke is using you for your power. When he gets what he wants, he'll crush you. You _know_ it's true."

Ren hesitates. Deep down, he does know. He has _always_ known. But it's too late. Too late to go back, too late to second guess his decisions. He knows the day is coming, the day when Snoke inevitably turns against him, and all he can do is be prepared for its eventual arrival.

"It's too late", he says out loud, his voice lowered, his anger subdued.

Han shakes his head. "No, it's not. Leave here with me. Come home. We _miss_ you."

Oh how he wishes he could believe that. He _wants_ to believe that. Wants it so much that it tears at him, tears at his very soul so much that it borders on physical pain. But he cannot. _He cannot_. Snoke had warned him. Told him that this trial of his would be difficult. He had believed himself to be strong, but now...

Now he is not so sure.

"I'm being torn apart. I want to be free of this pain", he says out loud, voice faltering, _vulnerable_. This decision pains him, pains him much more than anything he has ever felt. He cannot grasp his ever simmering anger, cannot drown his pain with it. Not now, not when faced with the gentle face of his father.

"I know what I have to do, but I don't know if I have the strength to do it" he says out loud, voice barely above a whisper. "Will you help me?"

Han takes the few final steps towards his son, his expression stoic, but not unkind. "Yes. Anything."

Ren unclasps his lightsaber from his belt and slowly, ever so slowly, offers it to his father. Han Solo looks at him in disbelief, surprised that his son is doing this, offering his weapon to him as a sign of... What? Peace?

Han Solo smiles, and suddenly Kylo Ren remembers. Remembers his childhood, the loneliness, the abandonment. The father that never wanted him, never took him to his adventures. The mother that was too busy to notice the anguish of her son, too busy to give him comfort when he needed it.

The uncle that betrayed him.

The light from the sun falters and dies, and with it dies the Light in Kylo Ren's eyes. There's a momentary flicker of uncertainty on Han Solo's face, as if he suddenly realises what is going to happen, that this exchange is not going to end as he had thought.

The lightsaber crackles to life, its vicious hum filling the silence. Darkness fills Kylo Ren as he watches the life ebb away from his father. He extinguishes the blade and Han stumbles, catching the railing for support.

Han Solo glances at his son for one last time before he plummets to the abyss below. Kylo Ren steels himself against the emotion he saw in those eyes before the inevitable fall.

 _Forgiveness_.

"NO!"

He looks up, Darkness swirling within him, feeding him with more power than he has ever felt, and his gaze lands upon the girl. He feels nothing, nothing but anger, anger and relief at having passed this trial. His priorities shift, and no longer is he focused on finding Han Solo. He has a new target now, a new priority.

Rey.

He falters when the bolt from Chewbacca's bowcaster hits his side.

-o-o-o-

Rey has never seen snow and now... Now she has no time to appreciate it, no time to stare at it in wonder. The pine forest is eerily dark around them as Finn drags her through the falling snow. Agony is clear on both their faces, the agony of the unexpected loss they have just witnessed.

Han is _gone_.

Rey feels the tears in her eyes and cannot comprehend their presence. She has never cared enough for another being to feel this broken about their loss. There was never room for affection or attachments on Jakku, not in the life of a scavenger. But she knows Han's death is more than that, more than the simple sorrow at the loss of someone she has grown fond of. She feels his loss like the loss of a father she has just been reunited with.

It is pain. Uncontrolled, unfiltered _pain_.

Suddenly they slam into a halt, and Rey instantly understands why. Kylo Ren emerges from within the forest, his dark hair whipping around his face, his eyes glittering pools of darkness. He flicks his wrist, igniting his saber, its vicious hum filling the forest as snow falls around him, painting the trees and the snow with red. The sight fills Rey with a new sense of dread.

He's going to kill them.

But Kylo Ren does not move. He ignores Finn's presence, his whole focus on Rey, and she instinctively raises the blaster she stole from that Stormtrooper that had guarded her cell.

"We're not done yet", Kylo Ren tells them – tells _her_.

She seethes, her anger returning, the power coming with it in rippling waves, overpowering the ever growing feeling of terror that they are going to die here. "You're a _monster!_ "

Kylo Ren ignores her words. "It's just us now. Han Solo can't save you."

Rey snaps. She moves forward, aims the blaster, preparing to fire, Han's instructions at the forefront of her mind. But the blaster flies out of her grasp, and she feels the surge of Kylo Ren's power as he violently pushes her backwards. She hits a tree, harshly, forcefully, and falls to the snow covered ground. Pain. Pain all over her. Terror that she is going to die. The impact has dazed her, and her control at the gathering power is slipping. She is barely aware of Finn's frantic calls, her dazed mind focusing solely on the vicious hum of Kylo Ren's red blade.

Suddenly, another hum springs to life, painting the forest in blue. The Skywalker lightsaber. In her daze she manages to move her head just enough to see Finn and Kylo Ren face one another. Rey had forgotten about Luke Skywalker's lightsaber, didn't even know what had become of it after she had frantically tried to rid herself of it and the vision touching it had provided by thrust it into Maz's hands. But now she is filled with a new hope as she sees it in Finn's grasp.

Suddenly both blades are moving, the sound of their clashing fills the air, painting the forest in red, blue and an odd shade of purple. Rey is still stunned, unable to move her body, barely coherent enough to watch the swirling lights of the lightsabers through the flurry of snow Finn and Kylo Ren raise with their movements. It is...

 _Beautiful_.

Suddenly Rey's mind snaps back into focus when she hears Finn's agonised yell. She scrambles back up to her feet, just in time to see Kylo Ren straighten his pose, barely sparing another glance at his fallen opponent as he switches off his lightsaber. He reaches out with his hand, and Rey follows the movement.

Luke Skywalker's saber.

Anger simmers and suddenly Rey's arm snaps up, her fingers outstretched towards the saber. She will _not_ have this monster take the saber. She will _not!_ She recalls the vision she saw when her fingers first grazed its surface, and fears what Kylo Ren might see if he were to do the same.

Power swirls around her, swelling, and suddenly the saber flies through the air. It zooms past Kylo Ren, who has just enough time to take a small step back to avoid it from colliding with his head. The saber lands in Rey's hand, and she feels it... _pulse_. The power around her reacts, and she grasps the saber with both hands. Kylo Ren is staring at her, disbelieving that she snatched the weapon from right under his grasp.

She ignites the saber. Her eyes are ablaze, reflecting the lightsaber's glow, and she sees Kylo Ren falter, hesitate. He ignites his weapon, twirls it in his hand, and takes his battle stance. Waiting.

Rey charges.

-o-o-o-

Kylo Ren is surprised by the ferocity she shows when she attacks him. She has never fought with a sword before, that much is obvious from her movements, from the way she swings the lightsaber, and how she is unbalanced by the lack of weight from the blade itself. But he can feel power collecting around her, guiding her steps, her movements. She follows them on instinct, slashing, dodging, parrying, her ferociousness driving Ren back, forcing him to defend himself.

Never has he fought with an opponent like this before. Never has he felt such raw, untamed potential in someone. Never has he seen the Force respond to an opponents command's with the strength it does when _she_ wields it.

But no, that is not quite true. He _has_ seen this before, in himself. He is much like her, with the untamed power of the Force that is always at his fingertips. He barely considers it nowadays – using the Force is second nature to him. But he knows it is not so simple for everyone, that not all Force sensitives find it this easy to call the Force to do their bidding.

His mother, a prime example of that.

But Rey... She commands the power at her grasp with such ease that he is astounded she has not used it all her life. It seems to come to her as easily as breathing, as easily as it comes to him. Her grasp of it is clumsy, but her ferociousness – her _determination_ – more than makes up for it. He finds himself on the defencive, blocking and parrying her attacks, never finding an opportunity to counter.

It is then that a thought begins to emerge in his mind. A thought of a possibility that he thought was lost to him. He thought he had driven her away by the harsh method he had used to interrogate her for the location of Luke Skywalker. But this... Perhaps he can still persuade her. To have her fight _with_ him. To have her at his side.

She is untrained. But she _could_ be his equal.

This thought finally gives him the strength he has been looking for. The strength to not merely block her attacks, but to start _pushing_. He is the one that advances now, turning the tides of battle in his favour. She is untrained, and though she _could_ be his equal, _he_ is the one with superior command of the Force.

Their lightsabers lock and the ground behind Rey suddenly crumbles, leaving her standing precariously close to the edge. Kylo Ren takes advantage of this, pushing her towards the chasm, though his true intention is _not_ to push her over, merely unbalance her.

He will win this fight, he is certain of that. And she _will_ join him.

"You need a teacher!" he tells her over the violent crackling of their lightsabers, staring at her over their crossed blades. "I can show you the ways of the Force!"

Her expression falters, the ferocious look on her face melting away momentarily to give way to confusion.

"The Force", she murmurs, and she sounds... Surprised?

She closes her eyes, and he allows her that. Had she not realised the truth of the power she has been wielding this whole time? But he is patient, uncharacteristically so, as he waits for her response, not pushing nor relenting, their blades still crossed between them.

When she opens her eyes, he realises his mistake. Gone is the wild ferociousness. Her eyes now reflect only the patient calm that has allowed a lone, abandoned girl to survive the nights on Jakku with only herself and her dreams for company. The power gathers around her, and now she is _aware_ of its presence, of the command she can exert over it.

Kylo Ren has no chance as she pushes him back, using her saber with only one hand. Beneath her calm lies the fury of the desert, and it fuels her movements, her attacks, and unbalances his movements. He falls, scampering back to his feet, but she is coming at him again, unrelenting, _unforgiving_.

His saber flies from his grasp, and then there is searing pain. It has been long since he has felt the scorching heat of a lightsaber cutting into his skin, burning through soft tissue, searing into his flesh, cauterising the wound instantly with its intense heat. He is unable to fully suppress his groan as he falls on his back, pain radiating off of the scorch mark on is face, on his chest. It's a miracle she has not taken his eye, and despite the pain he cannot help but stare at her in wonder.

She stands above him, saber held low at her side, its tip pointed towards the ground. Her eyes reflect the darkness of space, her power the violently pulsing stars that will tear apart anything that comes too close.

And he realises, then, that she is close to the edge. _So_ close to taking her final step to the Dark Side. All she has to do is kill him, and though every fibre in his body _screams_ for him to defend himself, he knows that he cannot.

And so he resigns himself to his fate. To merely watching her in silence, waiting for the final blow.

-o-o-o-

Rey is panting, harsh breaths, gasps of the cold air of the pine forest. The smell of ozone lingers in the air, a result of their intense duel, a duel that _she_ won. She vibrates with intense power, power she has _never_ felt before. It is intoxicating, this power that she now commands. Kylo Ren stares up at her from where her last blow landed him. Weak. _Defeated_. She could end this all now, avenge Han's death, with one last strike.

Time stills around her as she is faced with that decision. He is defenceless, _resigned_ to his fate, waiting for his death to come. It is in that moment that she realises the true edge she is balancing on. The chasm behind her means nothing at the face of falling to the same Darkness that she saw in _his_ eyes moments before he killed his own father.

Images flash before her. One Lord of Darkness falling, another rising in his wake. She would take revenge on every wrong ever done to her, a hurricane of destruction as powerful as the sandstorms of Jakku. No one would stand in her way, none would be left alive after she is done.

She would even kill her friends.

She gasps, her eyes clearing, widening in fright at the vision of death and destruction she sees awaiting her if she takes this final step. Suddenly the ground quakes beneath her and she stumbles as another chasm forms between herself and her fallen opponent. She cannot tear her eyes away from him, cannot stop the terror of what she almost did from seeping into her eyes.

He does nothing. Only watches her, his face perfectly blank.

He knows, she realises. Knows the vision she just saw. Knows the future that would have awaited her had she struck him down. She knows he can see the weakness in her eyes now, her fear and terror of _herself_ and what, exactly, she is capable of.

She tears herself away from his gaze, reminds herself that the planet is crumbling down around them. She stumbles through the snow and fallen trees, struggling to maintain her balance as powerful tremors shake her to her very core. Somehow she manages to find Finn, manages to drag him towards where he said the _Millenium Falcon_ was waiting, _hoping_ that Chewbacca has made his way there safely.

She cannot shake the feeling of his eyes upon her, even when they are long gone, safely inside the _Falcon_ and enveloped in the stunning light of hyperspace, nor the terror of just how close she was to becoming like him.

* * *

 _ **AN:**_ Alright so I finally have an idea of where all this is going, now that these first three chapters of me getting the hang of these two characters are done. The next chapter is where things start to slowly slide more and more away from canon, though there are things from _The Last Jedi_ that I want to include. I've also set myself a goal of getting out a weekly update, so you can expect the next chapter coming out at the end of next week. :)


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